Thursday 4 March 2010

Apple of my eye

I am hoping that this is going to be something a series of short tales, following sunshine and the rain this is next in the series.

There wasn’t much inspiration behind it, other than simply want to write so i wont talk to much here just i hope you enjoy this one and please leave comments since it helps my ego.

Since i haven’t visited anyway interesting recently or taken photo’s I'm digging in the achieves again and stealing some else's photo.

It's looking at you!

Once upon a time.

There was a man, a man who worked hard, a man who was liked by most and hated by none.

This man would spring from bed at the same time every day, he would eat the same breakfast everyday and be at his place of work at the same time everyday.

He would carefully prepare his reports for his master at 10am and 4pm everyday because his master told him so.

He would eat an apple and an orange at lunch time everyday because his mother told him so.

He would brush his teeth at 7.25am, again at 5.25pm and finally at 23.25pm because his dentist told him so.

He would take his girlfriend to the theatre on Thursday, the restaurant on Friday, the dance on Saturday and to her mothers on Sunday because she told him so.

This is a tale of a man who has never made a decision for himself.

It’s a sunny 4th of March and the man has brushed his teeth, he has presented his report,

Now his boss asks him, 'I want you to make a report on if this company should join with Anderson & sons, the board will follow your advice, I expect it by 10am on 5th of March'

The man was terrified by this, colour drained from his face he sat there in shock and worry at such a big decision.

He eats his apple and orange at 1pm and his landlord asks him this 'I'm putting the house on the market tomorrow, since you have lived there for 5 years I can give a good price for you too, I need to know if you are wanting to buy?'

The man was terrified by this, his head was swimming, his apple core hung in his hand with shock and worry at such a big decision.

The man prepared his 4pm report because he master told him so.

The man brushed his teeth at 5.25 because his dentist told him so, now his girlfriend asks him 'I want you to ask me for my hand in marriage, I have been waiting for 3 years now, do you want to marry me or not? This Friday would be perfect for a proposal'

The man was terrified by this, words were trapped in his throat, he stood there with his tooth brush hanging in his mouth with shock and worry at such a big decision.

The man went to the theatre because his girlfriend told him so.

It's a cloudy 5th of March and the man has brushed his teeth at 7.25am, he has arrived at work at 8.30am. He has not presented his report at 10am, his master says this to him 'Well what happen to the report? Because of you, Anderson & Sons have join with our rival, and you are fired'

The man was terrified by this, colour drained from his face, he sat there in shock and worry at hearing this news.

He still ate his apple and orange at 1pm when his landlord said this 'Sorry not to hear about your decision but some one else has made an offer and that means you have to vacate the house'

The man was terrified by this, his head was swimming, his apple core hung in his hand with shock and worry at hearing this news.

The man didn't make his report at 4pm, he did brush his teeth at 5.25pm when his girlfriend said this 'I know you have not bought a ring and that means you don't want to marry me and start a family so I will be leaving you now'

The man was terrified by this, words were trapped in his throat, he stood there with his tooth brush hanging in his mouth with shock and worry at hearing this news.

The man didn't go to the restaurant on Friday he did brush his teeth 23.25pm.

It’s a cold 6th of March, the man didn't brush his teeth at 7.25am for he had no home, he didn't go to work at 9am for he had no work, he didn't eat his apple and orange for he had no apple or orange, he didn't take his girlfriend to the dance for he had no girlfriend.

He had no one to make decisions for him anymore

This was the tale of the man who never never made a decision for himself

He who hesitates is lost

Tuesday 2 March 2010

Sick of drugs

I got reading a new book recently and felt the need to write something different, so in my slightly alcohol confused mind i started this short story and the sunshine and the rain. Partly inspired by how quickly the conditions change here and that people are never happy with what they have.

hope you enjoy it and again please leave comments at the end :0) i have also added most of the photos i got yesterday too

Sunshine and the rain

There was once a man who always complained to the gods about the weather.

This man would complain when the weather was cold, he would ask of the gods.

'Why is it always cold, can you not do something for me and make it hot again, my old bones need to feel the heat again, my garden needs to have the warmth to grow and cat need to know what is it like to be hot. If you do this for me I will be forever thankful and pray to you for as long as my old heart beats.'

Lo and behold the gods granted the old man his wish, the sun appeared from the clouds, heat was felt within his bones, flowers, trees and vegetables starting photosynthesis and grow quickly in the heat and the sun. All was good in the old man's garden and he thanked the gods like he promised.

On the second day the grass was brown, the plants wilting and the blossom was falling.

So he asked this of the gods

'Why is it always too hot, my bones are too warm, my garden can not take the sunshine, and my cat is sweating. If you can make it colder I will be forever thankful and pray to you as long as my old heart beats.'

Lo and behold the gods granted the old man his wish, the clouds came back, the sunshine faded, and the winds came with an almighty chill.

All was good in the old man's garden and he thanked the gods like he promised.

On the third day, his garden was too dry and dusty, the soil was blown by the wind, the leaves on the tree were flying away on the gusts and the flowers had shrunk to the ground.

So he asked this of the gods,

'Why is it always so dry here, my bones are weathered and dry, my garden can not take the arid conditions, and my cat needs water, can you bring the rains for me, if you do this I will be forever thankful and pray to you as long as my old heart beats.'

Lo and behold the gods granted the old man his wish, the clouds turned dark and fierce, the wind brought with it water, the soil became moist again, the plants turned there petal towards to rain, the tree was full of life again.

All was good in the old man's garden and he thanked the gods like he promised.

Then came the forth day, his garden was saturated with the rains, soil had turned to mud, he was soaked to the bone, and his cat was swimming.

So he asked this of the gods,

'Why is it always so wet here, my bones are dripping, my garden is a pond, and my cat can't swim, can you bring the sunshine, if you do this for me I will be forever thankful and pray to you as long as my old heart beats.'

Lo and behold the gods came and picked the old man up off the earth and carried him to a cave, 'You are never happy with the world, you always ask of us gods to make things better, now we shall seal you away forever with no weather to complain about'

With that the gods sealed the old man away under the mountain.

On the fifth day, the old man complained but the gods did not hear.

lazy pigeons watching the crowd Recession victim Sheffield cheese grater City hall and city lofts

Monday 1 March 2010

B side

Sometimes i think i have some special gift that means i can get things for free or at least for cheaper than they should be when in supermarkets and coffee places.  I’m sure the gift would be extended to other business but since i don’t go anywhere else that is all i know about.  This was first noticed in the friendly co op new the house, when i get £10 more than i should have, since then it seems that each time i go there i get the shopping for roughly half price.  This is now my favourite shop in the world, today the trend continued in starbucks, when i got a free drink and free home blend.  Part of that was down to the slack jawed guy behind the counter, he intentionally said i could have a free large coffee because i was getting the home blend on the nice shiny starbucks card when it should be a small one (i think, i can’t imagine any business is that generous to the customers) but then he didn’t ring through the first coffee i was buying. 

Is there some kind of angel that helps me in this situations, can i ask for the help in other ways, is that how it works, can i be selective like that…

Anyway that was the start of the day since then i have had my hair cut and sorry to say i had to pay for that :( oh well and the sunshine is great today, giving me back the energy i had last recently.  This morning i had sleepy eyes and the sunshine woke me up, i think the combo of late night movie watching and leaving curtains open is going to lead me to insanity soon.  I am getting old and have more signs of it all the time, the seating position at home has been giving me back ache and it still hurts the day after, that is just bad right? Seems my life is over now and things will start to get worse (is that being very negative of me?)

So photo’s well be taken later, expect them to be featured  in the next blog and i shall get back to my little and growing dream world one day that shall be ready to be shared with the real world.

So i will get back to me tasty coffee and write some more of my nonsense thoughts without any mention of the moon for a while anyway.

This is the only photo i have taken so far, hope you enjoy it :)

 

001

Wednesday 13 May 2009

Ask the magic 8 Ball - Less Than Jake



Who ever thought that not working was a good idea?


Man I can’t begin to say how bored I am, the only saving grace is that I don’t rely on day time TV to get me through the day. For a start I don’t know if Chinese television has this and then I could understand about 1 in 20 words. Right now even playing on the 360 is not doing it for me, back in the frame of mind when I turn it on then off almost right away. I need to get some more hobbies, today I shall have my first ever lesson in Chinese language, after self learning without too much conviction for the past couple of years. I am also wondering the city, checking out new areas even this only holds my attention for so long. There is only so much to see before it all becomes the same, so with this in mind I think I need to keep myself busy more often, my students do help with that, learning more about teaching and the exams which some of them are taking has given me something to work towards, providing me with goals to achieve. I still need something more than that, maybe a full time job would be the best idea, I know it makes sense and all that. I know that I can’t let myself become a house husband that would be so sad.
So what kind of sports could I get myself involved with again, I did always like canoeing, cycling, even kick boxing sounds interesting right now but that would be a temporary fad and could just be a change to let out my anger without much fear of punitive action against me. It would also be a good idea to get to know more people here other teachers however seem to be very odd people I guess if someone is prepared to live in any country then they aren’t the kind of person who is looking too hard for more friends, it’s not as if we come here in large groups of teachers is it? It is also difficult to start talking as people are always busy, so it’s actually quite a lonely job. Other teachers that I have been chatting with online have said the same thing. So it seems that apart from a few examples to the rule meeting people at the tutor job is not that easy how else can this happen. Starting a new hobby like some of the ones mentioned above would be a good place to start.
I could start taking part in long distance bike rides, but where is the fun in all that? Its al about the speed and trying not to be killed on the well organised roads in Beijing.
Well I think now it has taken me about 2 weeks to finish writing this post, I haven’t been in the mood to write recently, the last few days have been good for me, lots more students and money for me, although other parts of my time here may not be so good at least I have been keeping busy in some aspects. A lot of my time has been taken up by going to the gym almost every day then working and also meeting teachers for once, speaking normal English too, always find it difficult to speak quickly. I am so used to keeping it slow for the students and for abby, so it is refreshing to talk with a native speaker for once. Even though they are Australian I won’t hold that against them. I am slightly ashamed that I had to mention the clichéd, all Australians are criminals. What was I thinking!!!

Today is another fierce day, the sun is very strong its not too hot but you can feel it on your skin, I will not be spending too much time outside today.
Dude its been almost a month since my last post
Also why has it taken me 27 years to finally eat a mango, so nice but there is not easy or clean way to eat them, that’s all part of the fun!
Here is a photo to cheer people up:

Wednesday 15 April 2009

Bone Broke – The White Stripes



How to explain Lost to someone who only started watching it in the fifth season?
Man just thinking about it makes the show sound so bad and stupid, why have I been watching it so much? Maybe I cant explain it as well as watching the show would explain the point.

I only got as far as telling them that some people crashed on an island and the are bad people, never mind everything else that has happened, with flashbacks, forwards, monster, polar bears, people never telling others the whole story, a Chinese dude who can talk with the dead, characters walking after crippled, time travel, ghosts, crazy French women, a hatch, Scottish brother, hunted house which keeps moving, a ship stranded in the middle of the jungle, Jim from Neighbours being evil, how can it rain every time something bad is about to happen, Darma project, submarines, why jack is still a dick and why do people listen him, secret underwater base, a guy with eye liner who doesn’t age and so many people being half siblings and having connections before the island.

Yes it does sound like nonsense, just nonsense that is done well. I wonder if I missed anything from all that? Oh yes the numbers, which seem to have been forgotten about for last couple of seasons, and Hurley is still the size of a house but funny too and why did they kill off the Hobbit?

Well since there is going to be one final season after the current one, then what answers can will be given? Still we don’t know why the island can heal people and bring them back to life, why people can’t give birth on it, why no one can find it (well that has something to do with time travel)

I hope the show does finish without trying to drag it out to much, before it gets even more silly, like looking back at Alias, another show created by this guy after the 1st season that went daft and quickly died as it didn’t seem to go anywhere. Well it lasted for 5 years but the final one was so bad and had a couple of Dallas moments which is never a good idea.

Yes I have been busy learning so many different exam contents, another of my students is taking yet another exam, so this time it is for young learners, this kid is good and has a lot of talent in English already, that will be from Friday, I also have another new student today, right now I know nothing about them other than it’s female. That takes my total to 9 students now, soon they will start to overlap and I may have to turn some down. My weekend schedule is filling up quickly; next thing I need to do more of is prepare Chinese language to help me more, time for some lessons in it.

Well I’m off to watch the episode I started last night before being interrupted with so many questions, like who is that, what is he doing, who is that kid, what is this show about, sigh……

Monday 13 April 2009

The Pretender – Foo Fighters


Dude just who would have children?


What is the point when they reach the age of being able to question their environment and people around them then they become evil and how can I control someone else child when they can’t do the same? Surely at this age all of the joy and love that parents have in children must fly out of the window so quickly. Once everything around them has ceased being new and interesting, they become little versions of adults without the knowledge that the world sucks and life after school isn’t so much better then before.


So the reason for my latest outburst that children is not just the fact that I am getting older and grumpier all the time, that does have a large bearing on it, not get me wrong or anything, but the most recent and freshest reason in my mind is that I have a couple of my students are both at this age, one male and one female. This can’t be just because they are Chinese, I’m very certain and have had enough experiences to know that the same thing will happen in England too. Well, could I start to rant about the role of the parents here, well no not really fair to do that until I can have my own child, if that ever happens. All I can comment on is the influences of teachers, since I am only a pretend teacher here, how much can I do to make the kid learn?

Well two experiences I have had with 8 year old children when in the one on one environment of teaching have both been negative.


All that this experience has done is add more fuel to my anti child feeling which has been growing inside me for the last couple of years, if I can’t control this child could I able to say that I can be a good father, people will always say it’s different for your own and in some ways that may indeed be true but in no way will that help me feel better now.

Easter Monday

Well I have quite possibly had the second gayest day of my life, I won’t tell you the first just yet, haha but yeah going around a park with each click of the shutter my balls shrink, taking pictures of flowers, I may as well get a dress next. But the photo’s are now on photobucket, and I have left one at the end of this blog. To make me feel better I had to drink a beer when I got home. Mainly cos it has been so hot today and I went for a bike ride around the city. On the world’s heaviest and most uncomfortable cycle. Like it is made from solid steel, and got parts which are not needed on it, I never thought the weight of a bike would make that must difference, but I have force to around corners and trying to get some like that to stop is not easy. With the roads in Beijing quick breaking is very important.
I have remembered that I have a little bit of an issue with speed too, I have to get into races with people who try to overtake me, even people who are on scooters and electric bikes, I still have to go faster and here in this city that can easily mean hitting on the millions of cabs. Maybe I have a problem and that explains why I like to watch top gear and play grand theft auto!
Top gear the grown up jackass, does it say something about me when my top ten favourite shows in the last 10 years would have jackass and top gear both in the top 2. Am I so childish that I only want to see men hurting themselves or acting like idiots on TV for cheap laughs? Let’s face it top gear is an extension of jackass, maybe some of the stunts are less physically dangerous but some of the over the time activities and the joy in highlighting the male stupidity are common in both shows. Wonder if top gear goes jackass would be a bad idea for a tv show? Most likely Clarkson would not get along with the Americans and end up trying to shoot them, if he killed Bam that wouldn’t be a huge lose to the world.
Is this such a bad thing that I am so childish?

Of course not, no one could every say that these exactly highbrow entertainment.

But then again I do still enjoy Bottom which also would say a lot about me too.
Anyway I am hungry and want a coffee.

Get me some CAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday 8 April 2009

The alternative to love – Brendan Benson


Wednesday 8:56 Starbucks, Beijing

Maybe it was me and maybe it was you?

How important is that question right now, is it more important to grow from all of this and to find myself again, having given so much for someone else it is time to take something for me. So I will stand by what I have done and stay here for a different reason. Like I have said to other people over the last month, this is something that I have to do seem I must have the courage to stay. Maybe she can would understand and not expect too much from one man, maybe she can or maybe she can’t, maybe she can love me again maybe she can’t, maybe I should stop being so focused on questions that I can’t find the answers to right now.
The simple fact is that I have already made my mind up, now I just need to understand my feelings better

Today I am heading around the city looking for this chuffing embassy and hunting for information, then I will continue to write nonsense in Starbucks with the hope that one day it will be published, next time I post it will be more about Beijing not relationships.

Pic of the day time, so then which was my photo in the last entry, a prize will go to the lucky reader who gets it right.